Hello! Let’s Talk: Routines

Time is the hardest thing...

Hello, Stoic Runners! This week, I want to talk about one of the hardest parts about running in adulthood: time and routines. In my life and many other people’s, there’s generally not enough of it. Even the most dedicated runners struggle to get in solid runs some days. The best answer I have for this is: learn to flex. This is part of Stoicism as well, to learn to be adaptable to your situation.

Change is Hard for All of Us

There have been two big changes in my life where I’ve had to adapt my run times, and they were both very, very difficult to navigate. The first was when I was 19. For 12 years, I ran every day at 3pm, 5 days per week. Then I quit my college running team and that routine of practice was gone. The rhythm of my life was shattered. I cried in my college dorm room every day at 3pm for over a semester. I was too shy to go run when the campus was lively, so I would wait until the sun goes down and then go run at night. I found that my evening runs calmed me and made me feel whole like my afternoon ones had, and I would return to campus refreshed. 

As I got older, my routine got later. I found myself running at 9 and 10 pm, and I perceived that “most runners” love morning runs. I felt pressure to love them too, so I tried them. To put it briefly: I hate morning runs. I’m stiff and slothful, and I’d rather be drinking coffee and staring out of windows or sleeping than hitting the pavement. I’ve tried for about 15 years to like morning runs and I’m still trying! I’m doing a solid fine on it, I’d say; I still like night runs. 

What About the Experts?

You might be thinking “But Fitz! What about all the studies that say running at [whatever] time of day is best?!” I say: who cares? Some studies say morning runs will get you the most bang for your buck; some say night; some say you have to mix it up. All are both right and wrong, because the best thing you can do is to go run, whenever you have the time. If it's a struggle for you to find time or to adapt your routine, know you're not alone and that the struggle is real. You can do it; be kind to yourself.

So what’s your routine?

I have a lot on my plate, but no more than a lot of other people. I have two children under 3, a full time job, and a partner. That means I have one hour—including drive-time—everyday to run or workout. Just ONE. Because any more than that and I feel like I’m either burdening my partner, cheating my children, or shirking my work. The guilt is real! I’m just not set up to be one of those “sweat twice a day” people or those people who run 18 milers all the time. Like, I’m so happy for those people that they get to do that, but that’s not my life. If it’s not your life, either, don’t worry about it. Do what you can with what you have, but do it. Commit to yourself totally for that one hour or half hour. Think of nothing else; think of you. You’re worth it.

Guilt and Taking Time

I want to leave you with this bit of advice: Never let anyone, not a partner, not friends, not parents or children, make you feel like you shouldn’t run because you should be with them. Some days, you have to skip, but make those days really exceptional: mostly just emergencies. Running is part of your life’s pattern, and centering one part of your day on yourself will make you a more thoughtful, patient, and energetic partner, parent, workmate, etc. If you must place a value on your activity, think of it this way: running is an investment in your mental and physical health that accrues with interest. If you run routinely, you’ll be able to recover faster from stresses and injury, think more creatively, and avoid illnesses. You’ll be more valuable and useful after you run than if you skip it, and that value will compound over years. 

I've really struggled with feeling selfish and guilty for insisting on running , but that insistence has served both me and my loved ones well. I plan on publishing practical ways to have conversations with your friends and family about needing to go run in the future, so look out fo for those, but for now, just know this: you're worth the time running takes, and so are your loved ones.

I'll see you all on this newsletter again next week, but for today, remember: go run.